Voicing our hurts from the very beginning even when we were just uncomfortable. We noticed introspectively that something wasn’t right. Subtle or sudden we process pain as fast as humanly possible. Some of the most gruesome of injury’s have a delayed pain response. As the body is very much shocked by the extent of the trauma. The pain to follow those physical events can be excruciating and often debilitating.
There is great science and research to show how pain in the body is often hyperbolically amplified by the brain. Depending on the state and raise of that individual their pain could be a death sentence. The person that once was will never return. They’ve lost physically yet the brain destroyed the person they once were. Which is a much greater loss. Communication is painful. I type and retype my words these days. Editing texts and words as I write them. Fearing mistake and anxious by its context. Fuck. Again I can’t think straight forward. Everything is edited all of the time. Pruned and trimmed down to essentials. Every word scrutinized and reviewed for the missing context the personality or slick manipulations. Whatever the motivations I hear and see these from people in their actions or micro expressions. The internal judgement for external behaviours. Self confidence. Or it’s lacking.
This is the blade we stand on. A fine forged weapon beneath our feet in language is our ability to communicate. The sharpest sword in war and peace. We dance and sign to one another riddled with doubt or dillusion by the volcanos of our lives. The pain points that are sticky in our memories move through our time like hot lava. Yet as we sleep the shredder starts to sweep the cutting room floor. The clips of our past fade and what’s left is Lava Rock. Fond memories burst through nostalgia but the rocks glow hot or fossilize. We communicate. We build. We survive. The pain gives us power.
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